19 Kasım 2012 Pazartesi

If money weren't an issue, would I get surgery?

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I was just asking myself this question after reading another thread. I know I will never have skin removal surgery because it's a moot point. It's not covered by health insurance for most people and I'm sure I would never be able to convince a doctor of it's necessity either as it doesn't hinder me or cause me problems in any way.

But I never asked myself, "well, what if money wasn't an issue?" Would I get the surgery?" And you know... I don't know. I have loose skin on my abdomen that could be taken care of by surgery and I have terrible bat wings. My inner thighs are wiggly too - not sure anything can be done about that one.

I ask myself, "Would I be willing to put up with the pain and healing for vanity?" As, for me, it would be about vanity. And, could I risk serious health side effects and even death for vanity? Again, I don't know... I'm thinking that even if everything was covered by insurance and that I didn't even have to pay a copay or deductible, I wouldn't do it.

And I think that's because I'm 42. I would probably feel differently if I were 25 or something. I'm married, plan to stay married. I'm scarred by pregnancies and my husband loves me and is happy with my body now. So... why would I risk so much? I might be willing to risk more if I had more years of feeling young and beautiful ahead of me.

Now, don't get me wrong. I don't think you need to roll over and die when you hit 50. I want to be a rocking 50! 60! and on up. I want people to say, "look at that grandma go!" But I guess I can forgive my body for having more imperfections at this age than I would have been able to do when I was much younger.

On the other hand... once in awhile I get a tickle in my brain about, "Wouldn't it be great to rock my clothes without loose skin? Wouldn't it be great to erase (or mostly erase) from my body the evidence of my fat past? But then... why did I let myself get fat in the first place? I wish I could figure that one out the most!



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